Friday, December 11, 2009

Yaad aayeinge yeh pal..!

My feet felt suffocated. My legs felt hung without support. I was restless in my sleep. I knew something was odd but could not place what. And then suddenly they breathed. They were freed from that predicament. And then there was a tap on my shoulder, after which my leg felt rested too. And my soul finally was at peace.

A busy intersection in Bangalore. An ocean of people all around. I grunted, grrrrr-ed and turned around, to pace ahead, and more importantly AWAY. But then I felt a tug on my jacket. A further tug on me. My head was tempted beyond imagination to lose cool.

Some not so memorable days, when there was that one extra sound in my throat, and one extra pulse in the heart. When back ached to get rid of that pulse. Some warmth was endowed and then after a brief trance, everything seemed much better. And hence this isn’t so bad a memory finally.

Together everywhere, package deal, buy one get one free. Who ever invited one, had to invite the other. Poor inviters! Were stuck.

Sharing is joy. It was indeed. Fighting is fun. It was indeed. Every equation, every relationship has to stand a test of time. And it did, indeed. After being coined as Tom and Jerry of the class, ignoring each other on many days out of the many many days we stayed together, howling and screaming, and exceeding each other’s expectations in putting a drama while fighting, but pouncing on and ripping on just about anybody who tried to step in to resolve issues, friendship matured and was proven.

The one who removed my shoes and tapped my shoulder to make me realize my hanging legs can be put on bed on those crazy days of work. The one I fought with at a busy intersection in Bangalore, and then she pulled me to fight further when I was trying to pull away – and this time I didn’t pull away. Always ready to give me the healing touch (she knows Reiki, and is good at it) on the days my breathing hurt. My room-mate for five years, and my friend for life, is embarking on a new journey towards being someone else’s room-mate for lifetime. And I am not jealous, not complaining!

Wishing you two a beautiful life full of glee and bliss!

Love always!

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

What's in a name anyway!

Something really wrong today. Have been working with a gentleman who owns a business we support for the last 12 months. His name is Tony. I usually don’t get to see him too often. Usually it is limited to phone calls and emails. But I had to meet him today. Pleading to give me more business. And what do I do. I keep calling him Tom all through. And every time I call him Tom, I realize, apologize, and correct myself. Now I have a reason if he does not give business to me. Anyway, a little while later, I meet a guy in the hallway whose name is Anuj. I know for over a year now that his name is Anuj. And I have always called him Anuj. Upon meeting him this afternoon, I go hey Anshul, how are you! And keep walking. The next second I realize my mistake but I just keep walking hoping he wouldn’t have heard me. This is a little unlikely though. There is a limit to embarrassment but guess not sometimes. If this was not enough already here is the final one. I am working, and i get a call from someone called Dawn. I saw her name flashing. And guess how I answer this call - Dawn speaking!

I guess I should go home now.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Old is Gold..!

nostalgic snapshots in b-n-w, sway as they hum

holding on to some and losing out on some

funny feeling in the gut, strange and unclear

seems objects in rear-view mirror are closer than they appear

Networking Not Working

Social networks are the order of the day. Since the time internet fever caught up and broadband connections were made available in common households the world has found a need to connect (which is good!). So the social network sites became very powerful. You found some, some found you, and before you knew, almost everyone you knew and perhaps would you smile at when you meet, was on your friend’s list. But then you started noticing that you were getting repeated scraps from people who are on your friend’s list but not exactly “friends”, asking the same “hey! How are you?” How many times do you want to answer the same question when you know they are more concerned about the number of scraps they can boast of (apparently commensurate with popularity quotient) than any concern to your good health or the lack of it? And then you get automatically logged on to some messenger and then someone wants to chat too. You have matured (“aged” was the first choice of word) a little, have no patience for chatting, so-what if you accepted a friend request from the person in question. So then you found out there is a brahmastra available which you took pretty long to figure out - the life savior “invisible” mode. Now you can log on with ease without the fear of getting caught and do all the browsing you want.

You are basking in the glory of having fooled this world and in some time you realize if you are ignoring the world, the world is not taking any particular interest in you either. Out of sight out of mind you see. Ah! This is not working too well now. So you start writing into scrapbooks here and there, comment on photos that were uploaded like six months back. You don’t even get immediate responses. You are perplexed why every one has decided to close doors on you. You avoided some but you did not really avoid most. So the prized answer finally comes out in someone’s reply - “by the way I don’t come here too often. FB is much better”. When you get a similar answer from three different people, you know where the world is concentrating these days. So you too try to go to FB. But then the realization strikes, not the entire world this time. Be careful. Since you consider yourself quite a techno savvy person, you know account creation is just a few steps. You immediately create an account and click on all the buttons that appear and will create no delay. So your account is ready, but by then accidentally, since default was checked, you ended up announcing your arrival and sending invites to your entire contact list in the mail service you are using. So everyone in the world not only is aware of your arrival, also has a request from you to add them as a friend. They oblige, and you have more than a hundred friends before you remember logging on next time. Good job, lucky you.

By the way FB is complicated.


So this friend of mine who was travelling out to UK goes to the security check in gate and produces his passport to a nice looking airport staff. Her immediate comment - this picture is old. (Not that it was a problem, but just a comment). This guy is not one of those simple ones who will leave it at "yes" or may be something more humorous like "young days" or something like that decides to take his shot at momentary flirting (how long can you spend at that counter anyway??), wears his best smile and asks - so which
me do you prefer? Pat comes the reply - neither.

7000 miles in the air were spent tending the bruised self esteem.

(Man in context: thank me for not sharing your name with all :) - pay the price if you don't :D )

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Watkins Glen

Three people. All breaking into sweat. Out of the long walk, or the panic button!?

A: This looks like some animal crap.

R: Yes it does indeed.

A: And this is not a small animal. It is.. something big.

K: RReally!

R: Oh..!...! What do you think which animal would it be?

A: Oh come on now, I haven’t carried out a research in animal crap. Match the following. Right side animal names and left side images of their crap. All I know is it has to be some big animal!

This was some real conversation taking place when we recently went hiking at Watkins Glen, a State Park in upstate NY. There were two trails available. We just picked the map and realized one trail was substantially longer than the other. What satisfaction would you get in coming back from a place you went visiting specially and not going for the best? At this point best was somehow proportional to longest. After walking for about an hour we realized that we were walking on a trail which had growth on it. Straight away gives an impression it is not walked on in some time. Woods were getting denser, trail narrower, and atmosphere quieter. This is when we came across this big mass of animal and dung and the conversation above took place. In this adventure group of three people, Kusuma was getting nervous but she didn’t want the first one to hint a retreat. I, not particularly scared, but getting uncomfortable with the trail, asked Rachit, what does the map look like? How far are we from the end? We need to walk back also. And I feel we have come very far. It does not even look very interesting from here. What do you say?

Rachit was the tour guide who had carried out the research on the place and came up with this plan of coming here and hiking. He had heard a lot about this and seen some pictures as well. So he knew this place has a treasure of natural beauty that we can not afford to miss, especially after coming 100 miles from home on a Saturday. He had resistance written on his face.

I did not want to disappoint him. He was in a spot. I decided to make it simple. See lets walk for like 5 to 10 more minutes. If this place still does not make any sense to us, we will head back. Both of them agreed. Rachit happily, and Kusuma succumbing to the majority.

As we walked further about for five minutes, we met a fork. And sorry we could not travel both, and be three travelers we stood, and long as far as we could, to where it bent in the undergrowth. There was no chance of taking the road less traveled by as both looked equally fair and not traveled by in the recent past. Decision time again and here I came forward to say this was it. We need to head back. I could see disappointment on Rachit’s face and thus had to tell him that we were really uncomfortable to proceed any further, not enjoying any more, and hence we give him an option. Either he comes back with us or goes further alone. We did not intend to walk further distance any more. As this conversation was taking place, we heard a hoarse sound in the woods. This was some animal. And was not a horse. We froze for a second. The sequence we were walking in right now was Rachit first followed by me and Kusuma behind me. As soon as we heard that sound, Kusuma jumped in and stood between me and Rachit. In such panic situations, I have this strange habit of laughing. I immediately broke into laughter, but was keeping it very controlled because if there was an animal, I did not want to draw its attention. We immediately turned around and started walking fast, almost running. I later deciphered that sound had to be a goose. But that did not deter us. We kept walking back, faster than ever, and were getting breathless. Rachit asked on the way back if we could go on the shorter trail at least now. Ofcourse we can! I did not want to disappoint him any further. It was a beautiful place anyway. Hiking was going good too but for this terror towards the end of the first trail. We were nearing the shorter trail, also called the Gorge trail and we could hear people now. It was a relief to be nearing civilization of sorts. And then we embarked on to the shorter trail. As soon as we started on this trail, we were climbing down steps which took us near the lake. As we descended our expressions from tired and distressed changed to most joyful and excited. What a sight it was!! What a beautiful sight!! We came to a tiny bridge made of rocks with stream underneath. High rocks on both the sides were giving it an effect of hills and these rocks were perfectly decorated with trees all over. There were small waterfalls and small fountains every fifteen twenty steps. The gorge was narrow, weathered and beautiful. The sides looked like the ridges of Grand Canyon. Ofcourse not that grand but still quite a sight .It was absolutely breathtaking. This trail although shorter than the other one was not short at all. We went through the gorge, passed small bridges, small tunnels, one spiral ladder like tunnel trough a cave, rainbow falls, water fountains, different moods water. Soft at some places and thunderous at others. For the most part we kept going down towards the landing of the gorge passing through all these different beautiful points, and then the journey upwards began. We saw stars in daylight while climbing back up. It was not a pleasant journey up because this time it did not meander through the gorge but was a steep walk up. And this wasn’t a short walk. Way up was dreadful. Somehow made it with the last lap being cleared with Jai Mata Di and Jai Bajrang Bali.

Was a fantastic trip! The adventure was from for over actually, but more about it some other time. I do not want to dilute the high of Watkins Glen by sharing the episode that included an adventure of a different kind. Hence more later!

Friday, September 4, 2009

Where was I?

I was hibernating. I like doing that sometimes.  Besides there was a lot going on to keep me away. Well actually there wasn't a lot, it was just one factor that got added to my life and changed it a good deal. No it is still not the special someone, it is a special something. My new car - new for me, otherwise have been around for couple of years. Is an absolute beauty. Two months and 2800 miles old in my life. Yes, I have been driving around like a woman possessed. I am loving every minute.  

Monday, August 3, 2009

Lord I'm 500 miles away from home

If this train is running right

I'll be home by Saturday night

I'm 500 miles away from home

Away from home, away from home, away from home. Away from home I'm 500 miles away from home...!

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Ofcourse no one successful deserved success!

Did you think otherwise?

Some forums can be so enlightening. I was going through one crappy thread in one of the forums on the net where a bunch of Einsteins, who could neither manage one line of decent English nor one decent line of English, were dissecting the senior leadership of my organization. It was surely not in good taste. I don’t read too much in these but still was going through to catch the latest rumors. And here is the learning from the whole discussion. I am sorry for summarizing and not copying the entire thread. It was far more educational and interesting than I have it here.

- Some top guys, who obviously don’t deserve what they have, are ruining the corporate image and carving path for our downslide. And silly me, I was all through thinking the organization that has grown exponentially under the same leaders was able to reach these heights because of the hard work of all and able leadership of the higher ups. But now I know it was pure luck. So they are sure, and hence I am sure that downfall is near.

- And you always know the rule that if a woman is successful, she must have either “compromised” somewhere to get to the top, or someone much senior is trying to pursue her. Don’t tell me you didn’t know this?

- Oh, there is one more – organization wants to showcase some women in the top bracket to prove gender equality, and hence the better ones who are not necessarily good enough for the role get the big roles. So this was also discussed in details. Enlightened me some more.

- Then there were discussions about how the owner of this business has no head of his own. Yeah little did I know that this empire was not built by his brains, but the great minds that were colliding together in this forum.

- But the cherry on the icing was provided by this young man who obviously saw all the dirt and the mud-slinging and decided it was best place to ask this million dollar question – you guys seem to know a lot about this company. I got an offer letter from here, I am wondering if you could tell me if they will finally call me or not and should I join if they do. Look at this concern! I mean please look at his concern. Some buffoons on the internet are throwing insults at the company and the people, and ofcourse this is the best place, and these are the best people to seek your career advice from!

Kudos one, kudos all! I am sure all your billion dollar entities are doing extremely well under your able leaderships. Keep flourishing, good luck! And someday if the better sense prevails - Fut the shuck up!

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Standing up against piracy.. not coming easy. But I am trying my best. I am not downloading any music. I am not downloading any movie either. I am buying my books. Compromising in the process, on collectibles and not on integrity. I am buying what I want desperately want. It is expensive. But it is just. And hence I will try my best not to contribute to this so easily doable crime.

I am feeling good :)

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

All in a day's work..!

And this is truly hilarious! My cousin after her masters in computer application from a premium institute went on to join a renowned software firm. She was assigned a project and she found there was another fresher, also a girl, in her team. In the initial phase of trying impress people, these two were out there to do anything to outdo the other. As a result they never seemed to agree on the same points. One day they were called for a meeting – this was their first customer call. The manager asked both of them to record the minutes of the meeting. After the meeting both sent out the minutes to the manager. The manager called them and said its good to see you both have finally agreed upon something. Both their mails read – 8 minutes.

Monday, April 27, 2009

An excerpt..!

.. do you even know what time of the day it is. Why are you calling now?
Just wanted to check everything is ok. Anyway you are awake everyday till some unearthly hours, aren’t you? … were you sleeping? Oh..
Hmm.. I slept about half an hour back.
Ok, its ok if you want to sleep.. and not want to talk..
..not at this hour. Please.. we can talk in the morning.
Yeah.. may not exactly happen. I have a tight day tomorrow.. but its ok.. didn’t mean to disturb you.
No.. No you did not.. disturb me. Ok lets talk.. what do you want to talk about.
Nothing in particu.. hey I am getting another call. Why don’t I call you in five minutes?
But you will call right?
Oh yes I will.. ok.. 5 mins..
You didn’t call back.
Hey I know.. I am sorry, got busy.
Okay so you are hurt or something.
No, nope.. just thinking.. how you know everything about me, and I know nothing about you. You never meet my expectations.. but I still don’t stop expecting. How I fall flat on my face each time, and how I stand up again, and get ready for the next fall…
.. well! The thumb rule is – don’t expect anything. Did I ask you to? No right! I don’t get a nice feeling when people start expecting things from me.
People? People!
I mean friends included.
Hey you sound serious and all.
No I am not. (Why can’t I say the truth? Have I also become one of those.. People pleasers!)
You came, you saw, you conquered.
I just don’t understand how I allowed you to!
You know I have fallen for you. I know you know I have fallen for you. You take all the advantages. And you reciprocate from a safe distance. You are not dishonest, but you don’t tell me everything. And you are candid about it, that you are not comfortable telling me everything. You are not allowing me any insight into you. Yet you play with words when you want me to get weak and successfully have your way through.. what are you upto? And what the hell is wrong with me?

Thursday, April 23, 2009

..aur duniya na dikhe

muskurate gungunate zindagi chalti nahi
ashq ke bhi imtihaan hain, haan kami khalti nahi
sholay hain raahon mein aage chalna zaroori bhi sakhe
band kar lo dono aankhein aur duniya na dikhe

Thursday, April 9, 2009! Its all about numbers!!

Another tag from Iya. This was not as easy as it looked. So here is what it is supposed to do - if life could be defined in numbers, i should layout mine. Hmm.. was interesting, but ofcourse i have not done justice to it! Have attempted something nevertheless and here is my list!
0 - Every list starts from here. Now you know what I do for a living! :)
1 is the number of kicks I need to stop procrastinating and get working.
2 minds – dual personality – true Gemini!
3 is the highest number of back to back movies I have done in theatres.
4 is the time of the evening when I absolutely need caffeine.
5 the hour of the morning my alarm is set to and is also the number of times I snooze my alarm. (My snooze time is set to 15 minutes)
6 is the years I have been working, and have been away from home.
7 is the number of the hour. C-Sat is out and it is 7/7. 7 is also the number I in lighter moods identify with – Bond – 007! :)
8 is the number of educational institutions I have studied across.
9 is the number of states in India I have lived in.
10-dulkar is the best!!

And i hereby tag -
Sumi Di - this one is interesting!
Aditya - there is inactivity on your blog for a while!
and everyone else who would like to take this up. Just let me know! :)

Updated - Could not help playing with these numbers!
1 for the 1derland I always (at least once every day) slip in.
2day is what I live for and live in.
3 cheers for the friends I have in life! Its awesome to have you guys around!!
4ked was the path of life when I chose the road less traveled by.. and that made all the difference.
5 days of work followed by 2 days of party. Work hard party harder. New found mantra in life.
6 written thrice, is the devil’s number, and is my birth month too. Is that a coincidence?
7 years of vegetarianism got over when I..
..8 chicken on Saturday.. yes this is true!
B9 and compassionate – what i would want to be remembered as!
Con10t and happy – is what I want to be, always!


Further update - Some more people who are tagged and must complete this really soon -
Vini Bhaiya - welcome back to the world of blogging!
Amit - Kahaan hain aap? Chalo take this up now!
Addy - you have no escape ok!
Kapil - and what else were you thinking? you also HAVE to do it.
Dusty Fog - missing from the circuit yet again. Where art thou?
and last but not the least - Bua - really not sure if you would want to do this but would love to see your list! :)

Sunday, April 5, 2009

Broken and shattered..!

This post is an original piece of work. Any resemblance to any speech (of certain mr amar, akbar or anthony) is purely coincidental.. oh no not even that.. any resemblance is just not possible. And if you still find some, know it its your fault ok!

Friends, Men Women, Countrymen, lend me your ears
I come here to tell you about the woes I underwent in the last couple of hours
The evil that airlines do shatters dreams of some
The good is often just bypassed, surpassed and forgotten
So let it be with me
The trustworthy Jet Blue
Told people there was bad weather in New York
And hence my flight was cancelled from Rochester
If it was so, it was a good enough reason to cancel it
But the flight was supposed to go from Syracuse into New York (when there was bad weather in New York!)
So come I speak at the funeral of a dream
That I cherished for the last two months
For I wanted to see Bryan Adams perform and was so kicked about it too.
I asked the customer care execs about the other options I had
And the best they suggested was to take a flight from Syracuse
Syracuse, which is 100 miles away
Folks the flight was supposed to depart in two hours time
And hence we got into the cab in next 15 minutes and rushed to Syracuse
We were in time for the flight and sat down in the terminal lobby
For the flight announced delay
Famished that we were, picked up a bagel and coffee
And waited for another hour
When they announced further delay
We ran out of topics for conversation too after a while
And between the yawns we heard the announcement
That the flight would take off only after half past seven
Shattered as I was, came out and got the trip cancelled at the counter
The trip that was planned two months in advance
And was dreamt about every day ever since.
So come I speak at the funeral of a dream
That I cherished for the last two months
For I wanted to see Bryan Adams perform and was so kicked about it too.
With no mood to spend a single extra dime on the way back
Which was important to be traversed still
Went to the bus station and took a bus back to Rochester
Nothing to do in the bus and too scared to plug in my iPod
For I could have missed an announcement and eventually my stop
All I did was sit quiet and think about the day gone by
And the preparations that were put in for this show
And the endorsements and advertising too that was part of the package
Of feeling excited and happy and thrilled and what not
But alas! This was perhaps not meant to be
So come I speak at the funeral of a dream
That I cherished for the last two months
For I wanted to see Bryan Adams perform and was so kicked about it too.
Ended has the dream and would understand may be a few
With shattering of this dream, my heart broke too..!

Addy: I hate you! So you are a second term in the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and wizardry! You are good at your job dude.. hunh!

Iya: Ofcourse could not repeat Bangalore 2004.. and now you know why :(

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

..on arranged marriage!

...arranged marriage is the intersection point at which the downward spiral of expectation meets the upward spiral of desperation (Read it at Cynic's blog - and thought it was brilliant.)

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Thank you for the music!

The show was supposed to start at 6. People started gathering into Palace grounds, in those miles long queues, by 4 itself. No one could relinquish the chance of a better view, better standing position, as close as possible to the rock star. We could get into the arena at about 5.30. And though we knew there were miles of people behind us, this place looked so packed already. Anyway, we found some place and stood too. The evening started at 6.30 with channel V VJ’s screaming into the mic and the crowd going berserk. Just couldn’t wait for the man to come on the stage and mesmerize us – this time LIVE! But chief guest arrives in the end, isn’t it! So the first performance of this evening was by a then-new Indian band called Aasman, and the only song that sounded familiar (and I didn’t say “nice” mind you) was chandu ke chache ne… They crooned for forty five minutes. And when they finished there was a huge applause, not because they were great, but because they had “finished” their performance to give way to the man himself. But that was not to be. After fifteen minutes of wait, there was another band on the stage, who I didn’t recognize then and don’t remember now – so you can imagine how good they were. They were some overseas all boys band, performed topless and received tremendous booing. Not that they were not ruffled, they were, but they were there to perform and so they did. Took about forty minutes. By the end of their performance, the crowd was agitated, irritated and tired. Think about it, people started flowing in at 4, it was over half past eight, so everyone was standing for more than four hours, had been subjected to some unpleasant music for the last two hours, and the man was not to be seen still. There was inactivity on the stage again for some twenty minutes. The irritability was increasing.. big time. Each and every soul present there was getting vocal about it. We so hated him for not showing up till then and it was already 9. And then suddenly mic came to life, stage still didn’t, and we heard a very familiar, a very heavenly – here I am – this is me – I came into this world – so wild and free. Lights came on – and there he was. Bryan Adams! Oh there he was, in flesh and blood. Whoa! What a moment that was, every mouth in that ground roared at the top of its voice to cheer for that man. It was deafening, and most scintillating. No leg was feeling tired any more, no heart was complaining, finally the wait seemed worth. He set the stage on fire, went on to perform all his famous numbers, and we all sang along. Still envy the girl he randomly picked from the audience to sing with him. The crowd moved with him, we sang and swayed and he performed and performed. We swooned as he sang, we swooned as he moved, we swooned to the tunes of his guitar. And these were the fastest two hours of the day (month? Year?). Just didn’t realize how time passed when he sang. So soon it was 11 and the show was over. We could have been there and stood for days if he could perform that long. The rats were not allowed to go any close to the Pied Piper as he threw hugs, kisses, thanks in the air and left. What a night that was, what a night!
Ladies and Gentlemen, this was Bangalore, in 2004. And since then I have been longing to catch a glimpse once again. Bryan Adams is performing in New York in April, and I AM GOING! It is a Friday, I have applied for leave, and I am going to be there, to see him perform again! Can’t wait, New York City, I am coming! :)

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Sandese aate hain..!

I insisted some of my friends from my pervious team on sending me letters. Hand written letters. I was sure that the idea would be shooed away upfront and I will meet the same old – oh come on, you meant really or what! But I was proved wrong. And this was one of those times when you love to be proved wrong. I didn’t get just one two, I received six letters. Six handwritten letters! And not just one page letters, 1 one page, 3 two pages, 1 four pages, 1 five pages. Just opening the envelope was such a wow moment! :)
Thanks to:
Shiks - one cool cat! Thanks for taking me down the memory lane and getting me nostalgic! miss those days! and you deserve a special thanks for convincing others and distributing A4 sheets too! :)
Sowji - for overlooking my lack of effort in staying connected and still writing to me, you are super cool!
Vini - for making me laugh till I cried. I pardon you for your most horrible handwriting too :) you rock buddy!
Surabhi - for not only writing a wonderful letter, but writing it in hindi! Kudos, and thanks a ton! Was such an enjoyable experience!
Dhinesh - for writing my testimonial almost. Why don’t you actually forward the same text as my orkut testimonial! The only slight problem is you wont know the text as there is no Sent Items for handwritten letters :D
Rahul - for letting me know that what the..! there are better ways to keep connected! This isn’t the coolest. But still writing :) (But believe me Rahul, this is the coolest! :) )

Saturday, March 7, 2009


Tagged by Iya this time. This is my second tag and this tag too makes me write about myself. Iya you need to pay me for this one. This was long.

Nope. Though it was picked from a book that my mom and bua were reading before I was born and they liked the name, but it wasn’t that I was named after the character.

26th January. Incidentally had gone to temple, and there I for no rhyme and reason felt so overwhelmed that I choked.

I do! One of the very few things I like about myself.

No meat for me at all. I am a vegetarian by choice.

Thankfully no. I don’t have a license yet.

Guess so.

I do sometimes. Mmm.. a lot of times actually!

(?) Yes. Thanks for your concern by the way.

Yo man! Yes I will. I will sky dive too.

Kelloggs Fruit and Yogurt. That’s my idea of cereal these days.

Ya I do. And loosen them.


You mean I have to choose one. That is unfair. Ok so my current favorite is chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream.


Their voice. Can be the biggest turn on, and can be a super turn off too.



Should be my discipline or the lack of it.

My parents :(

Noooo.. this tag is not spicy. I would want to ask more interesting questions may be.

Black trousers, black shoes.

Khabar nahi – from dostana


Natural - Has to be the smell of rain washing the land. Artificial – Cool waters still tops the chart.

My friend Kapil.

She is my best friend, has been so since times immemorial..


Black.. turning grey now.

Dark brown


What boss! You want me to prepare a list or what. Ok the perennial 24x7 favorite is Rajma Chawal.

Happy endings

He is just not that into you




I don’t have one :( No one gave me one :( :(

Stranger in the mirror :)

Confessions of a Shopaholic.

I don’t have a mouse pad :(

Didn’t watch TV last night. Don’t watch TV at all.

Pitter patter pitter patter..


My current abode – lord I am 500(,000) miles away from home :(

Away from home, away from home,

Away from home, away from home

Lord I am five hundred miles (much more than that) miles away from home..

There are many real special ones.. but the one that tops my list is – I can sing songs with words reversed without changing the pace or the tempo of the song. For example – tujhe dekha to yeh jaana sanam – would be – jhetu khade to hey naja manas.

And who says it is not a talent!?


I am not fond of jewelry.

And why this assumption that I would have met my spouse or significant other? The quest is still on. Neighboring monarchies are being scanned for one knight in the shining armor.

One favorite? What a crazy question! Ok the latest favorite is Jai Ho! Oh I am in love with the song. Rehman, Gulzar saab.. had to be brilliant.

50.Favorite Musical?
Sound of Music

I hereby tag Rajita - who has never done a tag before - Kapil - who has announced he is deserting his blog - Vineha - who without any announcement has abandoned hers - Addy - need to see how he answers these.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

The LOOSE phenomenon

At the risk of drawing attention to all my spelling and grammatical mistakes (jinke ghar sheeshe ke hote hain waala attitude you know) I HAVE to write about this - Why is it that almost everybody seems to be going wrong with the spelling of LOSE? You LOSE someone, you don't LOOSE someone.
When I am with you I LOSE my mind.
He has LOOSE motions today.
Look for this word on different blogs and you will know this indeed is a casually spelt word and lot of people tend to go wrong with this.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

I know not what I do..

I was told to be good. This was a generic statement. For some things I asked what was good and what wasn’t, for others I decided to trust my judgment. Slowly I started giving importance to my value system and focused on being right – at gain or at loss – Right! This was important to me. I decided to choose people I wanted to be with. Not that I wanted to be with the most perfect human beings (gets boring doesn’t it) but I stuck (as much as I could) to my principles. And looking back there are a few instances of my life where I stuck to my principles during adversities, where perhaps many would have compromised on integrity, I didn’t, and I am proud of all those incidents. But was everything I think I did correct seen as correct by others? By my closest of friends? Not always. It bothered me some times, but I knew I am nice and I didn’t do any wrong. Gave me a good night’s sleep. And that’s all that mattered.

You too were asked to be nice. You too chose between right and wrong by your own judgment. You too built a value system for yourself that you will never compromise on because those are the core principles of your life you are governed by. You also won some and lost some, but you never compromised on what you thought was grey.

We crossed paths and we liked each other. Though both of us knew we were different in many things, we chose each other. I always dreamed of a partner who looked in the same direction as mine and understood my perspective. Somewhere down the way we found that there are clashes in our value systems. It disturbed me. And one disturbance lead to another. If you were the highest priority in my life, why was I not the highest in yours? I knew you loved me, but why was I not the number one. You never said I wasn’t but I never felt I was.

I lost you. And this time it does not feel right about losing though I am well within the boundaries of my core values. You are well within yours too. And fact remains we both were in love. One of us still is. I don’t know about you. After you left, I spoke to myself, at length, for days. What went wrong? It is difficult for me to say I was wrong I don’t think I was. But I stand sure today that you weren’t. I feel that things were never meant to work out. No fault of ours. No scarcity of love either. Destiny? Perhaps.

You will remain as adorable as you ever were.

A genius said (guess it was Shekhar Kapoor) -
I lost you not because you were you
I lost you because I was I.

Doesn’t apply completely, but makes a lot of sense to me today…

Sunday, February 1, 2009


I was having a lunch table conversation with a colleague of mine. This guy happens to be an afro-american. And somehow the conversation drifted to racism. Is there equality in the country now? Will things look up after Barak Obama’s moving into office? And here is what he had to say about this – the differences still prevail and the divide is still as big as ever. It is just that in professional environment people have no choice but to do business and hence you may not feel it but some of their judgments or there comments when they think you can not hear are brutal. And you can not blame them every time. It has a lot to do with the image we have created for ourselves. In the movies, television, everywhere, we are the bad people, and the truth most of the times is some of us really are. I am saying I am one of them only because of the geography we come from but nothing more. We are supposed to be impulsive and loud. You will see women clutching there wallets tighter on spotting an afro-american in the vicinity. In the parking lot when I get out of my car I have seen women in the next car sometimes being quick to lock their doors. It feels insulting but I understand their reasons. There is poverty in this group. It may not be as bad as homeless children on the road, but still the poverty is high. And poverty leads to crime. It lessens your personal values and sometimes degrades your thoughts because you perhaps tend to think nothing can go worse. I am one of those who go out of their way to make an extra effort to prove I am nice, thinking I might turn a stone. I might help change the general perception. I might help afro-american’s getting treated equally. In a competition when there are so many other things to concentrate on, this only adds to pressure because I know this is a negative which will go against me. And now I am concerned about my daughters. Because I have one negative, and so have you. And my daughters have two negatives. They aren’t white and they are girls. I try to teach them good values each day. My elder is in fifth grade and she has started understanding a couple of things that includes the importance of academics and why it is more important for her to come first than others in the same class. But my younger one is just five. And this morning was the first time she noticed something. There was a function in her school and dads were invited too. When we got off the car we saw a mad rush of people. The entire school was out in the ground with their dads. And that’s when my little one suddenly stopped walking and said, “dad wait a minute! Why is it that all these people have white faces, (pause) and some of them have like beige faces (perhaps tanned ones) and only we have brown faces.” I was thrown off guard. I knew this would come someday but had not anticipated it to be this early. There was no time to explain because we were already in the school. So I told her that sweetie I will tell you all about it when I come home in the evening, but you need to promise me you will not put this to anyone else before we talk. We will talk in the evening, is that ok? Ok she said and believe me this is going to be one history lesson today at home. I don’t know how far to go today as we will be discussing this for the first time, but guess its time now to know we are lesser mortals.
I was sitting speechless with locked jaws. I have been thinking about it and it sounds so unfair. Hopefully Obama being in office would make a difference.
Reminds me of a poem I read a couple of years back:

When I born, I black.
When I grow up, I black.
When I go in sun, I black.
When I cold, I black.
When I scared, I black.
When I sick, I black.
And when I die, I still black.
You white folks...When you born, you pink.
When you grow up, you white.
When you go in sun, you red.
When you cold, you blue.
When you scared, you yellow.
When you sick, you green.
When you bruised, you purple.
And when you die, you gray.
So who you callin' colored?!

Monday, January 26, 2009


ban ke lahoo nas nas mein coffee daude aur pukaare

kaam mein sab kuchh haar chuke ab himmat kaise haare

pray karo duniya US economy aur doobe na..!


Wednesday, January 21, 2009

some bakwaas!

So what else is new in your life?
Nothing really.

Nothing? What about the guy who you went out for dinner with?
What! What!! Doesn’t news travel fast? Now who is gossiping about me?

Peals of laughter in the room.

Hey I am still curious, who is doing me this big favor by circulating this news around and tarnishing my image. It was not as it sounds like. We just went out to eat together with emphasis on “eat” and not on “together”. He is married forgodsake!

So what! Do you think people care these days about such factors?

I care! And I know lot of people… no.. most people do care about these factors. And care or no care, this was not a “date” or something like what it has been made to sound like.

Ok if you say so? But how did this happen? I mean he called just you, he could have called us too right!
Hey relax guys! What “happen”ed. His company pays for his food. He is allowed to take a business co-worker out for food and he is new at this place. He asked me for some good places, I suggested, he asked directions, I gave him the directions, he asked if I could join him, and I declined. No thoughts, I had too much work that day. He offered the next day, and I agreed. He was looking for company, and I also could do with one.

Oh since when are you his “business” co-worker?
Come on guys! We share the same work place, his office is next to mine. He asks me a thousand questions about whats and wheres of the office building. I can’t believe I am answering these questions.

Ok relax! We were just pulling your leg.
I know but just three people knew I was going out for dinner. Now many more know and all are pulling my leg. My leg will come out of the socket.

Some more laughter. Ok lets talk about something else. So what are the plans for Christmas everyone?
Good question! Nothing so far. Let us plan some real fun!
I am going to see some friends in NYC and around. Please lets plan for some other time. I don’t want to miss out on fun. You guys just do..
.. meet some friends? Does he stay in NYC?
Oh please! Just shut up!
Hey I am sorry! Could not resist but go there again just this last time.

Hunh! Hey plan something for new years, what do you all say!
Yeah, lets plan out something. Apparently there is some party at one of the restaurants here. Should be fun…or.. hmm.. or may be not!
I am not sure but I think only couple entry allowed.
Oh, then lets go somewhere else.
.. try calling him, he may just agree!
Roars of laughter.
I swing the door open, and thwaaarrrrt close it behind me. I hear a pin drop silence behind in the room. And then giggle and finally another loud uproar.
I hate them all!

Friday, January 9, 2009

The exciting climax!

Ok so I am working at the client location. It has its own advantages and disadvantages and it is an endless debate that which one outweighs the other. I choose not to take a stand, not because I am diplomatic, but because I really don’t know. All I know is I learned how to “work hard and party harder” here. Some people like me sometimes when get into this mode, they forget that along with work hard and party harder, there is one more thing that is absolutely essential, and that is "sleeping". Of late there was a lot to do at work and then there was Christmas holiday that was packed-planned from start till the end, and that also didn’t feature “rest” as an action item. So in this action packed schedule, after slogging like a dog, and then holidaying quite well too, there was a need to take a break. And the day I felt the need to do so, as I was planning to take it easy at work, we uncovered that due to some trouble in one of the financial applications, a monster of an error was spotted. Who caused that error? not exactly me.. but I was part of the elite fraternity. And because of this problem, the system was heading to pay out double salary to 1400 employees.

It was 29th of December when we spotted this sweet little indecent problem. But that day I kept trying to prove it to myself and to everyone else that it was not a problem and that nothing will go wrong. I did that successfully too. But on 30th morning, I saw it written in big and bold, 1400 extra payouts were on their way in just over 24 hours time. And let me also tell you, 31st December happens to be the closing of financial year as well in this country. So basically if you have still not understood, it was an awfully colossal piece of crap I found myself into. This was not all. We charge money to keep the application clean and safe, so it was not the fault of the organization that would have made this huge payment (roughly just over a million dollars.. and I am not kidding and for a change I am not exaggerating either). Ok so as I mentioned I was a part of this fraternity who created this mess. Out of these people, one was a non-technical person, so there was no way he could contribute to fixing this mess. Half of the remaining fraternity confessed to have overwritten all the files that could have saved some grace. And also, this half holds no direct responsibility towards the application and hence while contributed almost 50% towards creation of the mess, would not have faced the music even half as much as the other half that was left. Ok so time for some disclosure. This fraternity comprised of three people – one non-technical genius, one free genius soul who could murder and say sorry, and the last not-so-genius-and-in-terribly-sorry-state. You guessed it right. That was me! I started wheezing the moment I heard that things were so wrong and it was just “me” all eyes were set to. This looked like an impossible mission and I felt like a helpless kid in the wild woods. I so badly wanted to go back home that very moment, and get house arrested for months. I was missing my parents. Well at this moment I was missing my family, extended family, friends, neighbors, everybody. I could be kept here for years without salary and still I would not have coughed up that kind of money. My fingers started behaving like my brain – JAMMED! My respiration was forming different patterns and all could be heard till the next room. Freaky it was! This anxiety lasted a couple of minutes. And then was time for the next step. I started preparing myself for the mission. I tried to calm myself, picked up the phone to speak to the application owner, to inform that I would be seizing the application for the rest of the day (note the time of this conversation please – it was 11.30 in the morning on the 30th December). He was made aware of the plausible hazard too. But his answer shook my lungs, liver, kidney, churned my stomach – “oh no this can not be true. Please ensure this does not happen. And hope you also understand that it is the end of the financial year, so it is a busy time. People can’t be asked to stay away from the application at this point. I might be able to give it to you a little early though, say at about 5 in the evening.” He sounded cool as cucumber. 5 – Early in the evening? “Please ensure this does not happen” – my head was spinning. I was not supposed to get on this work till 5 and I was not in the state to concentrate on anything else. I was thinking in all directions and that’s when I recollected a lesson imparted to me by my previous technical manager – if you create a mess and you are the only person who can correct it, no matter how bad it is, just remember that you are the ONLY one in the world who can correct this. So know your value. Don’t panic, calm yourself, and straighten it up! I suddenly felt better upon being hit by the thought that I was the ONLY person in the world who could fix this. So what was I waiting for! I started to work on the strategy to deal with the problem. After the application was given to me at 5, there was a close to an hour activity that the free genius soul needed to carry out. And then I could do whatever I could do till 6 in the morning. I went to meet the free genius soul after formulating what looked like a plan. Free genius soul, actually a nice guy, agreed to carry out the activity I wanted him to. The only problem was he had an important appointment till 7 and he could get on the system only after that. Some days are like that! So we decided that he gets the system till 8, there would be a buffer of half an hour with him, and at 8.30 I will start the remediation. I was about to leave when he said - "hey Anu! all the best! don't worry you will be fine! You have blessings of 1400 people". We burst out laughing. I could not believe we were laughing. But it actually relaxed me a little. :)

I reached home at about 5.30. Changed in three minutes, ate, and went to sleep with the alarm set for 8.20. I got up at 8.20, checked my mail. Yes, he had done his work. And then I started. The grand strategy that finally came out of my analysis earlier in the day had suggested that I would need to update these 1400 records manually in two different places. I was prepared for it. Ok there was no genius required any more. It was donkey work, endless donkey work. I could feel migraine building up by the time it was 11. I was feeling exhausted, but my work was far from done. Well I was done at about 3 in the morning. Did a round of testing on the system, sent out a mail and then slept off.

Pay went out, there was no big problem reported. Alright there were a small few, there were some people who did not get salary, but there was no account that got extra salary. There can still be news out even tomorrow about something not working, but is surely not as bad as it could have been. Phew! Wonderful experience, once in a lifetime experience. And for all I care, I am done with one for my lifetime now. I don’t want anything even half as close any more. As a result of this activity, my body decided not to cope with me and kind of gave up completely for not one not two but five days. I slept like 17 hours a day on the 1st, 2nd, and 3rd of Jan. 4th Jan was loose and swayed. This all begun on the 31st evening itself. And now you know how exciting the climax of the last year was for me and how i I brought in my new year. :)

Monday, January 5, 2009

Reminding Ria that she remembers everything

This post is dedicated to Ria, who is perhaps occupied, perhaps just procrastinating, but surely is not indifferent, as i know she still cares, as she did once upon a time, just doesnt express it that often, or may be doesnt express it at all any more! But she cares.. she does.. i know she does!

Ria remembers everything
Is just a little caught in the game of life
Like each one of us
But she does remember everything
She remembers the daily doses of giggle, chuckle, laugh-laugh
And the bickering and the gossips
The quizzes and the vivas
And the results days too
She remembers the daily tea cups
With each cup facing a different direction
And the free lunches at the favorite hang out
Which came with a chocolate day after day each day
The terrace between the two speed breakers
And the no show from there
Still the disappointment backed by some hope
Of someday seeing a view better than the sunset
That she did catch at times from there
She remembers the woofs and the oinks
And there pictorial representations too
She remembers the green horse that galloped
In every street she knew
She remembers listening to lobo and bryan adams
She remembers “do hemm” and “do pro”
And she can clearly recall the honk of 0844
She remembers the coiled staircase
And the red phone planted in between
The pizza and the coffee
The rainy day that threw her under fits of laughter
Upon hearing – “sab kudrat ki den hai”
Ria remembers a lot more
Is just a little caught in the game of life
Like each one of us
But she does remember everything...

For most of you my people, this will not make sense, but this is meant to make sense to Ria alone, who is a little forgetful, and a little busy, but still as loving as she was..!